My tryst with Covid 19 [and all it’s strains]

My shoes went for a half hour walk this morning after a gap of more than 60 days. Just a few rounds inside of our colony.I learnt something about this Corona virus. My teachers were the daily morning walkers. Yes the same ones who have been so focused on improving their fitness levels - outdoors - right through this pandemic.

Today I apologise for all the angry thoughts I’ve had every time I looked out of my windows these last 2 months and got a top-down view of these health conscious folk. Coming face-to-face / shoulder-to-shoulder with them [with a 6 feet gap], has changed my perspective. I dedicate this year’s ‘Teacher’s day’ - 5th September 2020 to them. If I live to see it.

Allow me to share my insights via 10 case studies - cases denote the likely mindset of the people I observed during the walk..…

Case 1: My virus will not infect my neighbour who is a friend

The last time I met this gentleman was pre- corona. And then today ‘Good Morning!’ He said loudly with a cheery wave as he headed straight towards me, his hands pulling his mask down to his chin. ‘I have not seen you for a very long time!’ …. Yup! I was staying home, staying safe :(

Case 2: Your virus will definitely infect me

These walkers would glare at me pointedly and cross over to the other side of the pathway every time they saw me. They did not do it with the regulars..…Just me - the new joinee into the walkers paradise who was likely to be a virus carrier.

Case 3: The virus is active only once in 5 minutes.

One round with the mask and then one round without the mask. There was a method to it.

Case 4: My virus will not infect anyone else

Therefore I will not wear a mask. Every time another human comes within my line of vision, I will cover my mouth and nose with my palm or handkerchief…because… I feel shy?…Ashamed?…Silly?

Case 5: My virus does not make its way out via the droplets from my nose and/or mouth

I wear my mask on my forehead, my chin or my neck. It is through these pores that it sneaks out. What do you know about the virus in me?

Case 6: I have no virus and I definitely don’t want to take in yours

I have a mask. It hangs around my neck like a garland. I pull it up to cover my mouth and nose every time I see someone [with or without a mask]. I do it to keep myself unadultrated.

Case 7: Runners don’t have the virus

I run around the 3 buildings in the colony. At periodic intervals, I slow down breathing heavily and panting loudly. I don’t wear a mask because I cannot run with it on, in peak summer. But you don’t need to worry.

Case 8: I observe social distancing from my dogs who run around freely. So the virus will not hurt me and so I will not wear a mask.

I get my dogs for a walk and make a couple of phone calls

[Anyway, I am hiding these calls from my wife…isn’t that mask / distancing enough?]

Case 9: The virus is scared of superman

So I decided to wear a cape! This gentleman knots the 2 ends of the narrow side of a thin white cotton towel around his neck [ yes - a towel with a red border]. The towel itself floats behind him as he walks. And now I am scared of superman :(

Case 10: The virus will not enter or get out of a sweaty nose

This is the last one I promise.

I wear a mask. It covers my mouth. My nose is out. I sweat a lot on my nose yaar..……On behalf of these poor souls who suffer from this unusual ailment, I have taken it upon myself to put up a request to our Management Committee.

Dear MC,

In the 15 years that I have lived in this colony, I have never ever asked you for anything. Please do this one thing for me. Next to every sanitiser stand, please set up a dispenser of ‘Nose coolants’ also.

Yours sincerely and forever grateful

A silent sufferer - colony resident.

Lesson Learnt: The strain of Corona virus and its impact differs according to the host it resides in. [Those dumb vaccine researchers are yet to figure this]

I hope Covid 19 will know that I am a lousy host.

The next time I go for a walk, it will only be because I lack adventure and entertainment in my life. [This clause will be valid for as long as the Covid-19 threat persists in the world]